One Last Disney Title

Well ladies and gentlemen of English 100, this will be the last required post for the class assignment, (not that's it is bad that this is required). Reflecting back on what has happened over the summer session brings up some really positive perceptions heading into the rest o my experience at Fullerton.

Let the record show that FCC has been much kinder to me than my RCC, (Riverside City College), campaign. Although it is still way too early to tell. Mrs. K, you have been an extremely patient and helpful instructor. I heard good things about your teaching, and I'm happy to say I wasn't let down in the least. The only thing I would have changed is the 7:40 start time; then maybe the classroom would have been more lively

Without this class I never would have started this blog-child. And I do plan on keeping this child as long as possible. I suppose everyone from class is free to continue to follow this weblog, (officially or unofficially), if they already are. Once again its been great, but there might be a chance I take a break for just a little bit in order to recharge my creative brain cells. This is Magic Michael Jordan Johnson reporting for ABC 7, Eyewitness News. Good night everyone

The Penultimate Post?

I am SOO tired right now! This week has been sorta busy for myself in the subtlest way. Right after class on Monday, I headed to the L.A. house in order to help my family out with some renovating stuff. That lasted all afternoon on Monday, and all day Tuesday -- seeing as I did not have class until a brief meeting on Wednesday, (which went quite well). -- Today after the one-on-one with my English professor, I headed home to plan for registering for my Fall semester classes. I ended up getting into one out of the three or four I need, (very frustrating). I still have quite a bit of homework to do, so I will be up super late again.

Not the best week I've experienced this summer, but one note of excitement is that a missionary team from my church is leaving for Chile this evening. The team is filled with dozens of friends I've become acquainted with over the years. Save for two chaperons and one high school senior, the entire team is made up of recently graduated high school kids. Its been such a blessing seeing them grow-up and now reach the age where they'll all define the adults they will be in the future; much like the way in which my church '08 peers and I have over the last couple years

Conspiracy

So I am entering the last full week of my summer English class. After that I will have one final day, and then I will try and prepare myself for the next semester -- as well as try and hangout with people I may have not had the chance to see this summer. We'll see how it all does down. --

After working on the research for my final essay for the class, I've somewhat been in a sort of inquisitive mindset regarding my topic. While the exact direction of my topic is still unclear, the general subject in relation to African American/black culture. Maybe even the culture of Afro Amer/black men in particular. Matters that have come up in the investigation process include white-black race relations, interracial relationships, and the paradigm and direction of identity in these black men.

Of course the focus of the project could apply to me. There are just so many questions that I've had in my own personal experiences that fuel the fire for the course of where this paper might head.

Does the dynamic between me and my "white" friends a true model of how black-white interaction should be, or is there still much understanding and change that must occur?

Should I think of my actions of "choosing" or having a "preference" for a mate that is interracial as measures of self-hatred, or even being a traitor to the ethnicity of my people?

How much individuality can I retain without being labeled as "not black"?

Must I lose my individuality to obtain racial identity?

All good questions I think. And believe it or not, but this song has been provided good motivation for some of those feelings.

Cats Don't Dance

Last night I got home, (Moreno Valley that is), after a tiring 2 and a half hour drive from Compton. I decided to take the 91 East, which was of course a bad idea to most people, but one of those adventures that came from my mind telling me, "Hey... you want a real traffic experience? Do it... take the 91. You know y0u wanna." (So I did).

After i got home, my mother and I enjoyed some watermelon balls -- ice cream sized scoops of watermelon immerse in Alizé and refrigerated -- and then I headed to my room to get some sleep for the night. But then I had an episode... an episode that occurs often in the Fletcher family. An episode of irrepressible song and dance. All the immediate members in my family are known for their vocal adeptness and skills, as well as some theatrical appearances here and there. That is, all of them save for myself.

Most of my life, I have been reserved in displaying the interests, wisdom, and talents that I've procured over my time in the world. I am the type of person who likes to be a "watcher"/"observer" and a "thinker "before choosing to utilize the "feeling "and "doing "aspects of my human nature. So it hasn't been until the past few years that I have chosen to try and establish myself as more of a "doer"; someone who'll act upon the knowledge and gifts they've been given. Thus as a result, I do a lot more singing, dancing, and making a fool of myself over that period of time -- Although the dancing usually only happens in front of close friends, and the singing only in front of my immediate family members. But it's all a work in progress. --

So back to the episode at hand. What simply started as listening to a couple of tunes in order to get some excess energy out of my system, turned into an all out concert for the old childhood toys and clothes in my closet. To help put the situation into perspective, I was doing all this while lying down in my bed. So while I was making the slickest, (and sexiest), moves known to man, in all likely hood I may have appeared to be more like a epileptic fish out of water, (or maybe even Squince from The Sandlot). But what mattered to me the most was that it was my heart expressing itself.

Observation and analyzing are tools of life that require a lot of mind power; it's the "feeling" and "doing" that utilize our hearts. And last night, my heart was happy to tell me that it was doing some growing and maturing of its own.

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons. You will find it is to the soul what a water bath is to the body. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

Escape to Witch Mountain

It's funny how hindsight works. Even when you start to look back on what has happened, you always leave with a sense as if you've looked ahead to what will occur. In what I am now calling my "Great Escape", I have ended up in the L.A. and O.C. counties gaining enlightenment from the mentor that is Life. To give a quick a synopsis of when I started to realize the script for this stage of life began, I would have to say scene 1, (or maybe it was the Prelude/Prologue), began this time two years ago.

The hero/villain/comic relief of this story, (aka "me"), enters the tale with sort of a recently troubled history, but with the resolve and prospect of develop himself into a more consummate young adult. Things go well the first few months of this new self-innovation period; there are new friends and acquaintances, new confidence, and new commitment to faith and church. But then the unexpected happens: strong feelings for someone of the opposite sex, (I know... who could have saw it coming). Unexpected attraction leads to a wounding attachment in an area of living the young man had no previous interest in pursuing before. In short, this new experience of emotions lead to the hero's 1st genuine heartache.

Being the most unfamiliar of emotions, the heartbreak lead to unwillingness, and an unfulfilling life style for this youth. But as He has many times before, God situates the young hero in dire circumstances as a way to reveal and grow the youth's character. The hero takes a year off of school to take care of his grandparents, and finds that the brokenness of his heart has lead to the renovation of his mind and spirit. Hardly any of the journey was easy; and at times the path just didn't seem clear. But it all worked out for the best

I wish I could go on a bit longer, (possibly look over and edit this before I post), but I have a midnight deadline that I'm cutting pretty close to. Wish I wouldn't have taken a nap. I've always strongly disliked them, and I think they feel the same way toward me.

The Last

The following are a few excerpts from the song "The Last" on the Culdesac album I was referring to earlier in the blog. Sorry if it seems like I have been ranting about the album a bit, I've just been really enthused/inspired/surprised by what I've heard off of it. It all speaks to my heart so well

I [didn't] get down with them other kids
Probably cause i talk too white, and i got a dad who's there
Momma couldn't take it; sold the place and got us outta there
Guest room: now the 6 of us splitting one with a restroom

Now I'm going to this school called Rockridge
School of the neighborhood we're trying to buy a house in
There's not a lot of black kids
So i stick out like a sore thumb with some bad acne

But really, what i wanna know is why i never fit in right
Like a fat dude, getting on a packed flight
Even when I make friends in the hallways
I'm wishin' i was someone else always

But i'm happy that that s**t happened to me
Cause it taught me most important is to do "me"
Cause everbody hate you till they love you
Facebook n***s [the] same [people] that will shove you

.................

Labels want me to hurry and cash my check in
But i keep my s**t free till the last possible second
Cause God knows that I don't need the money
You get your clothes free when you're rich. Ain't it funny?

But this limelight burn[s] like a m** f***
I wanna call my dad crying but i hangup
Cause i don't want him to worry; he's got his own s**t
So i send him a check and tell him to hold it

If anything happens [I] want you to know this
I always took the time to smell the roses
And wherever I am, I am doing fine
I'm here for a "good", not a "long" time

Hero

Yesterday I downloaded Childish Gambino’s album entitled “Culdesac”. Childish Gambino is the pen/stage name for actor/writer/comedian/musician Donald Glover. Glover is one of those few celebrities that seem to find a way to entertain and inspire me with every artistic effort they create. Donald’s album is mainly rap, and throughout my life I haven’t really grasped onto a lot of rapping endeavors; but I really like his album because it is one of the few works within the genre that I find myself completely relating to. It is this detail that has got me thinking more about the final out of class essay for English 100. The theme of the next writing project is supposed to be about seeing a common ideal or principle, and considering it in a new light. I’m having some rough ideas on maybe doing the essay on ethnicity and culture. Both Donald and I grew up in atmospheres that challenged how we identified ourselves culturally. My own experiences include growing up in a predominantly white church, being criticized for my grammatical and intellectual proficiencies, and having very different pursuits and interests during childhood, among other things. It will be interesting to see how all this works out.

Titled Inspired by -- Gambino

Difference

So I had a bit of a depressive episode this weekend. I know these things happen now and then, and all you can do is battle through them. But nonetheless, Weariness and I spent quite a lot of time together this weekend. It all turned out to be something I may have needed however, because after speaking to my mother, I came away with new insight and observations on the campaign that is my life. She was able to help me understand how one area of improvement I needed to better would be being more comfortable sharing and articulating who I am as an individual through my ideals and discernments. I know that the blog is helping me develop my poise and self-assurance; and I feel like becoming more comfortable in sharing my ideas to a small audience online is a subtle confidence builder as well. I now realize there’s a difference in being secure in whom you are, and maintaining security in saying who you are.

Title Inspired by -- Gambino

Alice in Wonderland

So I am a little stuck on what to write for this next blog. I have decided to just use this post as a sort of freewrite of my thoughts at the moment. Most of the time I do forget that this blog is an assignment. I have had a good experience blogging thus far, and I do believe that there is a respectable chance of me continuing to blog even after the class is over. I really miss my friends at the moment, but I think its only because I have so much down time on my lonesome. So I should be fine in a day or two when I hopefully get to see a few beautiful or handsome faces once again. Let’s see what else… I don’t know.

Oh, I forgot my clothes at home when I came out to school this week, so I’ve been wearing my brother’s clothes this whole week. Now I really want to buy some new stuff since I haven’t been able to invest in attire over the past few years. That may not have sounded very charming just now, but hey, it’s the truth. I think I’ll end this on that note. Consider this post signed, sealed, delivered

Add It Up

I was quite exasperated yesterday afternoon ― exasperated being a big word for “bored out of my mind” ― so through some help from a friend, I stumbled upon this study conducted from way back when dinosaurs ruled the world all the way up to the year 2010. This chart is of course satirical, but for some strange reason this diagram absolutely adds up. I’m sure there are plenty of people who'll find this funny, awkward, depressing, and some even opportunistic. It’s funny because it’s true. It’s awkward because it’s true. Its depressing, (especially in my case), because it’s true. And I’m sure you guessed it, but it’s opportunistic because… wait for it… it’s pretty much true.

Now I know the world isn’t black and white ― it’s a home for some of the most stunning and uncharted colors any person could imagine ― but this tutorial on what The Doghouse Diaries calls “Girlology” is fairly accurate, if not ingenious. It would explain why I’ve dabbled at most of these approaches and all I have to remember my attempts are a thimble, two rubber bands, heartbrake-itis, and a ham n’ cheese sandwich from 1982. So I suppose its time to change the way I approach the opposite sex… OR NOT!! Besides, that ham n' cheese is sorta like wine: the older it gets, the better it taste

A Letter to Marc Anthony

Let me start off this post by saying I am terribly, terribly sorry for the Disney-themed post titles. It’s somewhat less creative on my part to do them, (or at least that’s what I hear). I will, however, continue to do them. Why you might ask? Because it’s what’s best for the economy.

I was thinking last night how my blog can essentially seen by anyone ― an unsettling idea to say the least ― and that thinking turned into the realization that people from the distant future could one day look upon my blog after I’ve become emperor of sound, space, and other assorted lunch meats. Then I thought to myself that by that time comes, there should be technology that would allow me to send future messages to one of my former selves. So, due to these recent revelations, I’ve decided to write a letter to my 9 year old self.

Dear 9 Year-Old Youth Boy,

This is yourself but older. I know that I don’t need to show you any proof of this because you should already be expecting me. Well, well, where to start? I didn’t think it was possible, but we did get uglier. You are ranked 3rd world-wide behind the offspring of Carrot Top and Richard Simmons’ afros and some guy named Robert Pattinson. Word of advice, most of your same-grade peers at VCC grow-up and become model type beautiful. So you should try and stick with them as much as possible, that way some of your U-G-L-Y might rub off. You will become the greatest African American hockey prospect in the world at age 15, but you decide to put your talent in a safety deposit box for security reasons. Darth Vader is indeed your father ― it just so happens that Chewbacca is Luke’s father. I know what you’re thinking, “ooh, ooh, ooh” ― so you may want to begin sending Father’s Day cards now.

Turns out Michael Jackson is neither a zombie, ethereal being, nor space pilot for some Disney 4-D Space Core. He is mortal and unfortunately does pass away. Do not fret because he died saving Mary Jane Watson from a burning bush. Regarding life in high school, ask Mom to be home-schooled immediately. If you end up going to high school, take a bullet proof vest. There is so much to tell you, but unfortunately I don’t want to have the time. In summation, true friends and family come along in time. There’s no need to worry your head off at all, because before long you will truly have a unit of people that you may call your kin. Some might even read your blog.

With absolutely no sincerity,

Umm duh! You

Think Happy Thoughts!

It’s amazing sometimes how the smallest of moments in your young life, can manufacture the biggest of bearings upon your heart. How the simplest of actions and words you encounter find themselves altering their form. Morphing from normal concepts into the otherworldly; into our ever-present tools of life. Some of those tools aim to facilitate our well-being, while others act as devices resulting in our more terrifying tendencies and behaviors. But the ones I love the most are those enduring thoughts that end up shaping so much of what you strive to become. And yet you don’t even realize their precise impact until later on in life.

I decided to reminisce a couple days ago, and I found myself watching the movie Hook after not seeing the film for years and years now. And to my surprise, my experience this time around was much more touching and inspirational. I feel for the first time like I was truly able to appreciate and take in the entirety of what the motion picture has truly meant for me all this time. I realize now that an ambition I’ve held on to for most of my life wasn’t originally my own, (hardly anything is these days), but it was rather instilled through this “ordinary” movie ― which by the way is ordinary in no way to me.

Looking back, I now recognize that the first of my lofty aspirations for fatherhood started when I first discovered SPOILER ALERT ― Peter Pan’s happy thought was to be a daddy ― SPOILER END. It was like “lightning had just struck my brain”. It had never donned on me that my zeal for parenthood had been initially conceived from the pure joy and elation of Hook, rather than different aspects and dynamics of my family and surroundings. But the feeling was clear. It was that same sensation that continues to make me feel like being a good father, no a great one, is the ultimate adventure; the ultimate challenge for any man. I knew of course that there are many parents in this world. But for that first time, fatherhood became less of a subtlety, and rather something more ethereal; something worth being well thought-out. A good friend told me recently that a lot of times we recognize the journeys and conclusions to our own stories; even well before they come to pass. When I was 8, 10, and 12, it didn’t seem like the movie had much impact on my life ―aside from some really good jokes and imagination fodder. ― But with the benefit of hindsight, I suppose I’m just getting a better glimpse of how God’s marvelous plan continues to illustrate itself.

Brother Bear

I thought I’d dedicate this short post to my brother Greg. He has done a great job of following his dreams no matter which direction life begins to lead him. I’ve been blessed with a few brothers entering my life over the years, but none compare to “Greggy”.

Also, I’d just like to let Mrs. Professor Her Majesty Kominek know that my brother and I were huge WWF fans growing up as kids. My little brother and I would often have our own matches where we’d come in to our own entry music ― mine of course being X-Pac’s theme ― and execute move after move on each other. I made sure to due the Pedigree as often as I could. Once again Mrs. K, I do accept extra credit for being generally awesome. Joking of course… I think

The Reluctant Dragon

Well, I’m in my third week of school now, and the whole transitioning process seems to have gone quite splendidly. I’m back in an environment where I’ll be constantly challenged and encouraged to use my brain, (or rather what still remains of it). And it seems that although my schedule has become more condensed these past few weeks, I have still been able to see or communicate with long-time friends. Despite all of these lovely revelations however, I can’t help thinking of the direction that I am currently pursuing. As I grow older and older, it would seem only natural to reassess and analyze the career I want to pursue (neurosurgery). And I believe that I would be would be totally fine with all that thinking… if I was a robot who ran on batteries and oil.

When I look at my life and see some of the mistakes and confusion surrounding it, I realize that the human heart has so much to do with what has occurred. More importantly however, it’s the human heart that’s given me all those extravagant, unexpected moments of life as well. So there in lies the question: Do you follow your heart? Do you neglect a design you’ve pursued the majority of your life? Do you listen to your change of heart, even though you’d have no idea where to head next?

There’s a saying that goes, “there’s nothing new under the sun”; and truly there isn’t. So I know there’s no real reason to pull a Freakazoid and start fighting crime with very little of my insanity intact. I realize that as the nucleus of who I am grows and embraces various individuals around me, the argument between my heart and mind will continue to develop as well. And this dragon is ok with that… for now… I guess.

UP!

I’ve been doing a lot of reading and re-reading of blogs that some of my good friends have already started. I truly feel like I could be inspired to continue writing after this class is over. There’s one person in particular whose blog I’ve practically fallen in love with, even after knowing about it and occasionally examining from time to time.

I’ve known her for most of my life and have a tremendous amount of respect for the person that I’ve come to know over the years. But there’s just something about the internet that entices us as human beings to share our more personal essences. It’s been after some time that going back to examine her words, see her experiences, and glimpse deeper into her individuality, that I’ve been even more encouraged to become more vocal about my varying standpoints.

Because of being more of an observational type throughout life, I often have opinions and reflections that go unsaid. And it’s only recently that I’ve begun committing myself to sharing them. I realize now how important is it for us as people to share what is on our minds. I think I’d now rather risk embarrassment from 1000 people if it meant letting someone you admire know how important they truly are to you and others around them. I don’t often share my own thoughts with the many people that I encounter, but from where I’m standing now, the only place to go is…

Airbender? More Like Airhead

It would be blasphemous if I made the decision to name this post after a Disney movie. Everyone knows about the extensive years of gang feuding between the Nickers, (aka Nickelodeon), and the Mouse Crew, (aka Disney Company). Blood and lives have been spent because of the constant contempt between the feuding groups… but I digress. After waiting almost a year and a half in anticipation, I was able to finally see the film “The Last Airbender,” a film based off of the Nickelodeon animation. To my dismay, my experience could not have been more horrible. The movie ended up being somewhat unsatisfactory for my heavy standards. That of course might be the problem, but nonetheless I found myself uninterested in some of the actors’ portrayals and the overall direction of the film. I’d recommend seeing it still, so that others could make their own decisions, but maybe not in 3-D.